"oh how that love could change the world"

image via amada-thomas

Listening to: Rogue Wave: Be Kind-Remind

Today I woke up late for church. Amazing that a person could be late for 12:30 sacrament. I wandered in sleepily just in time for Relief Society. Today our lesson was taught by a very recent convert to the church, just 4 months in. I love converts to the church. There is a certain rawness, an unscripted and exposed insight to a true testimony of Jesus Christ. Our teacher is talented in many ways. She is very artistic. She drew pictures to accompany certain Gospel questions she wanted us to ponder.

"Why is love the number one commandment from God?"
"Why does God love us?"
"Why do we love him?"
"How can we show our love for him?"

I am always so enriched by the thoughts the sisters share. Why do we love God? Because he first loved us. How can we show our love for him? By serving his other Children and keeping his commandments. Why is love the number one commandment? Because that love will lead to actions which will lead to character. Our teacher was gracious enough to read a poem she wrote about her relationship with God. Again, there is a certain honesty that comes with new converts to the church. I was so touched by her poem. She is hauntingly good with words. Her poem described how it feels to be standing shaking in the rain and cold when Heavenly Father watches from the porch ready and waiting with a warm blanket. She talked about how she chose to suffer alone. Why do we do this? I know I so often do. I wander in the dark tunnel, taking a few steps forward and a few steps back, sometimes just sitting on the icy ground with my eyes shut to the seemingly distant light. But the light never moves. I am the one choosing to be close or distant from it. Heavenly Father stands waiting with an outstretched arm, waiting with an aching heart for his daughter to reach back. Oh how he must want to intervene on my life and my decisions. But being the wise and loving Father he is, he waits. With infinite patience he waits and watches. Sometimes even cries over me. How do WE feel God's love? We stand in Holy places where he can dwell. How can we love ourselves? We keep his commandments and feel the peace and comfort that comes along with those tiny yet significant choices. In a letter from a missionary I was advised to wrap my arms around my self and feel the love of my Heavenly Father. Oh how that love could change the world.


Keisha Voorhees said...

i feel like we are in very similar chapters of our lives spiritually. i could be completely and utterly wrong, but it doesn't really matter when it all comes down to it. i appreciate that i can take comfort knowing i'm not alone in my situation and your heartfelt words get me through hard times.
i cannot thank you enough <3

Cute and Sassy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Michael Addington said...

you just made my day better :) thanks for helpin me feel the spirit today. heres one of my favorites for ya..

35 Who shall separate us from the alove of Christ? shall btribulation, or distress, or cpersecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?
36 As it is written, For thy sake we are killed all the day long; we are accounted as sheep for the slaughter.
37 Nay, in all these things we are amore than conquerors through him that loved us.
38 For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come,
39 Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Paul a new convert himself, was quite the orator as well :)

Shannon said...

you have wisdom beyond your years. I truly miss you when I read your blog. We only knew one another very shortly and superficially, but you are a soul sister to me. This was beautiful.

Anonymous said...

I don't understand. You seem to have such a strong conviction, but you are always talking about starbucks and in all of your pictures you always look really trashy. Noy in a gross way but in a way too much makeup and really immodest outfits sort of way. I wish you had more of a self esteem. Your testimony could really touch the lives of so many people, only no one will be listening because you look like a walking contradiction. I don't mean this in a mean way, and I know I'm not perfect, but maybe just get youself some sleeves at least. Or you're going to have a hard time when / if you ever go to the temple. You seem like such a nice, thoughtful, ambitious girl with so much going for you. You don't need to lower your standards for approval. Just my 2 cents.

Anonymous said...

i simply adore you.