3/1/10

dear anonymous...

Anonymous says:
"I don't understand. You seem to have such a strong conviction, but you are always talking about starbucks and in all of your pictures you always look really trashy. Noy in a gross way but in a way too much makeup and really immodest outfits sort of way. I wish you had more of a self esteem. Your testimony could really touch the lives of so many people, only no one will be listening because you look like a walking contradiction. I don't mean this in a mean way, and I know I'm not perfect, but maybe just get youself some sleeves at least. Or you're going to have a hard time when / if you ever go to the temple. You seem like such a nice, thoughtful, ambitious girl with so much going for you. You don't need to lower your standards for approval. Just my 2 cents."

Dear Anonymous:
I wanted to respond to you, but considering that you chose to contact me anonymously I will just respond this way. I think any sort of advice, would be better received if it came from a credible source, but I have no idea who you are. If you feel that you know me well enough to judge me, than you should be comfortable confronting me like an adult. However I take no offense to your comment. In putting myself out there so honestly I expect criticism along the way. Unfortunately I think you have misunderstood everything I am trying to get across here. First of all, I can only recall one post where I mention Starbucks, if you actually read the post you would have known that I was talking about low-fat Hot Chocolate which I am pretty sure is acceptable in the Latter Day Saint way of life. Secondly, are only perfect people allowed to talk about their love for Christ? No where did I claim to be perfect. If you want to talk about my imperfections I will tell you right now that Immodesty isn't even at the top of the list. I am full of imperfections. Some more severe than that. I noticed that you said "if/when" you are going to the temple. Well I am here to tell you that I will be going to the temple. With our without the judgements of people like you I will attend the temple and make covenants like many others. I do have many imperfections to overcome along the way. Did you thoroughly read my previous post? If you did you must have skipped over the parts where I talk about the poor decisions I sometimes make, and how I sometimes choose to turn my back on the Savior. Remember when I said that I sometimes sit on the icy ground with my eyes closed to the seemingly distant light? I was talking about my stupidity, selfishness, and worldliness. And as perfect as you probably are, I am sure you have a few dark parts as well. We all do. Otherwise why would we have a need for a Savior? Lucky for you I have a strong testimony of the Gospel. But keep in mind, there are members of the church that could take a harsh judgement like yours and hold it against the entire church. If you are as Christlike as you claim to be, maybe you should be careful not to judge fellow members of the church and focus on yourself and improving on this journey.



37 comments:

lehi + sasha said...

wow. i am astound by the remarks by anonymous.
it's sad to think that many members become inactive because of self-righteous-ignorant people like that.

people like that are missionaries worst enemy. really. fellowship is so horrible in so many wards and branches. especially with people like that in your area. all your hard work just goes to waste. it's pretty upsetting actually.

nadia, i'm glad you are strong enough not to take this inconsiderate-rude comment to offense.

and while reading that comment, i've come to realize that she is the one with low self-esteem! obviously, she is saying things like that out of pure jealousy.

seriously, who goes around people's blogs to tell them things like that? i wonder how they would feel if they get criticized and judged on their own blog.

i guess her parent's didn't teach her to speak kindly to other people. poor girl.

nadia shea said...

Lehi and Sasha. Thank you for responding. I like to think that anonymous just really doesn't understand me, and everything that I am trying to convey on here. I am pretty sure, she doesn't know me personally. I just get the feeling that she doesn't. But I would never want to come off like a self-righteous person, I think I am pretty open about my many flaws. It's unfortunate that people within the church can be so judgemental. I have heard one too many stories where people left the church because someone judged them harshly. I even have inactive members of my family because they are afraid that they won't be accepted by the seemingly perfect members. It breaks my heart to be called a walking-contradiction. But aren't we all imperfect? Aren't we all, at times, walking-contradictions? There are no perfect people. That's what the beautiful Atonement is for!

Mollybelle said...

Oh my barfarama!
I don't even know what to say. It's just so funny cause you know "anonymous" felt that they were being so fantastic and righteous by calling you out on your immodesty. You know they were thinking they would really get you thinking....
oh barf.
This poor person is so busy worrying about you that I cringe just thinking about the flaws they themselves have but are too proud to realize.

You're a beautiful babe. And you've touched my mind and spirit over and over even with that trashy make up (????) and immodest attire (????).

Take it as a compliment dear. Your amazing sense of style combined with a sweet spirit drove someone crazy enough that they had to cop out in order to feel vindicated.

Colby and Samantha said...

Way to handle that Nads! One time I got a rude anonymous comment and thought the person was such a coward to say so many judgmental things and not even tell me who they were. I love your blog and think that you are so honest about your life on here. Love ya Nads!

angela hardison said...

i love your response. i've had my share of mean comments, and sometimes i take them harder than i should... people are a bit nutty, that's all there is to it.

Joseph&Devon said...

well said nadia!

Ashley said...

great response. i don't understand why some people feel the need to put others down. your blog is so awesome and you are such a strong person. don't let some anonymous person get you down. (not that you would)
:)

{megs in wonderland} said...

i HATE anonymous commentors, they dont have the BALLS to be real and up front! people think they can say whatever they want on the internet, because its all on a screen, its not like theyre hurting your feelings right?!?! WRONG. it sucks. i am glad you wrote back and defended yourself in a classy and elegant way. youre obviously much stronger (and cooler...) than they are!!!

ps i drink the double chocolate chip frappucinos from starbucks at least once a week and ive been through the temple... SCANDALOUS.
love you girl.

kate lines said...

nadia-

there is no way anonymous has ever met you. if she did, she would see the light of christ shines so strongly from you. she would see the kindness we all see.

mandyface said...

Playas they gonna play
& haters they gonna hate.
Ballas they gonna ball.
Shot callers they gonna call.
That ain't got nothing to do
with me and you.
That's the way it is.

Lex said...

Amen and amen! well handled!

Natalie said...

You are a example to me and I am sad to see that someone could say something so judgemental without knowing who you are, because if they did they wouldn't have come to such conclusions. The way you responded was with complete integrity and strength. Like myself people have fell away from the church because of judgemental harsh words and some never go back because they are too scared of that one person looking at them wrong and I am so grateful that your testimony in Christ and the gospel and the confidence you have in yourself allow you to not take that to heart.

I am sure anonymous is reading all these and feel so completely stupid for what he or she said, at least I hope "it" realizes "it" was in the wrong.

And we were all sent here to earth to do our best with the help of Christ, let him be the only one who Judges us in the end.

All your posts are FABulous... keep them going for the people who LOVE you for you!

Joslyn Marie said...

all i have to say is you go girl.

ann beret said...

nadz, you're such a rockstar. and your testimony has always been inspiring. love you, girl.

Malia said...

sorry about the hater.
i'm sure she will read these comments so i hope she realizes that critical comments via blog are not effective and pretty pointless in the end because unlike the judgement of christ (which is to encourage and give purpose) anonymous blog criticism leaves nothing but doubt.

hang in there girl, your blogging is great :)

Tahnee said...

wow. people can be really dumb! i dont know you that well, but i know your a good person :)

Sarah Garner said...

I read your blog now and then but haven't ever commented and don't know you in real life and I just wanted to come out of the blogosphere and give my thoughts.

A persons imperfections don't make their testimony any less profound or touching.

We're all on our own journey. We all have our own trials and imperfections to deal with, but we also all have the same loving and ever forgiving Savior.

She did get one thing right though "You seem like such a nice, thoughtful, ambitious girl with so much going for you."
:)

stacie and geoffrey... said...

Booyah!! I think Mandy said it best. (She must've heard MY testimony in seminary with Raban.)

Love Cami. said...

go nadia go nadia. people are stupid. you're amazing and you know where you stand with the Lord. im really proud of you.

Shannon said...

Wow. What a thoughtless person. And I am sure he / she doesn't know you because I only knew you for a couple weeks and couldn't disagree with them more. I think it's funny that these pictures this person is judging are your photo shoot pictures! Obviously your make up is going to be more over the top and your outfits maybe a little more themed than your normal life. But even if they weren't, it still doesn't matter. You are beautiful and naturally so. You have a light about you that anyone would envy. You are the furthest thing from a walking contradiction that I've ever known. In fact, I felt my own convictions strengthened in the time I spent and talked with you. You are an amazing person. It's sickening that the internet lets these petty cowards hide behind computer screens and say whatever they want with no consequence. There is a woman here in Orem who left her boys in a bathtub for a minute or two to put away some folded laundry and when she came back her youngest boy had drowned. Fortunately through the marvels of modern medicine and the power of the priesthood this baby was given a second chance and is now back home with his mommy. This story has been covered pretty heavily here in Utah on the news. On one of the news websites there is an article about her that people have been commenting on. So many hateful comments about how this mom deserved for her baby to die and didn't deserve a second chance because of her carelessness leaving her child alone. Sickening. The funny thing is that through this woman's journey, thousands of people all over the world learned to hold their babies just a little tighter, to prioritize a little better, to pray a little harder, and most importantly, that we do have a loving Father and Creator who is there, who knows us, who loves us, and who allows us to use His power through worthy priesthood holders, and who still perfoms miracles on earth today. It was through this woman's imperfection that many people remembered their Heavenly Father and their loving Savior and Redeemer. Sorry this is a long comment but I'm just so irritated. My point is that if you were perfect, I'm sure many people wouldn't be inspired, they'd just be intimidated. It's our imperfections who make us who we are and the journey we make to overcome them that inspire people. You truly are an inspiration and I am glad to hear that you are not taking this person's thoughtless comments to heart.

*To annonymous: I hope you realize that it is people like YOU, not people like Nadia, that make people not want to join the church. No one wants to join a church where they feel they have to be perfect not to be judged. Keep your spiteful comments in check, or just don't open your mouth at all, lest you be on the receiving end of one of these type of comments one day.

Vogels said...

I'm so sorry that you recieved such a shallow comment. It is very obvious this Anonymous doesn't know you. We've hung out only a few times in high school and you are one of the most sincere, loving and full of life person I've met. We all know no one is perfect. " He who is without sin casteth the first stone" Anonymous needs to check themselves! Good for you Nadia for being the bigger person in this

Shannon said...

By the way, you should read the response that mother I mentioned posted in her blog to all the rude comments. It was really beautiful and perfectly worded. I can't give you a link to it because she had this particular post protected, but her blog link is www.stakerzexposed.blogspot.com and the post is from February 26th (directly after the potty training post). Anyway, I thought you might like it and feel uplifted by it.

What the Hale's?! said...

"Secondly, are only perfect people allowed to talk about their love for Christ."

Amazing. If that were the case, I would be in a lot of trouble. I admire your testimony, your strength, and your courage. I wish there were more poeple like you around, and I don't even know you...

Jacob and Natalli said...

It makes me really sad when people say stuff like this, especially members of the church. We are supposed to be representing Christ, who loves everyone perfectly.
I don't know you, but I can tell you that your blog does not convey a thing "Anonymous" said it does. I admire your testimony, honesty, and that you are humble enough to admit when you have flaws.
You responded far more graciously than I could have.

Willi Nixon said...

:) good for you nadia. i pity the person who posted that comment, and celebrate us imperfect folk.

from one "immodest starbucks loving girl" to another,

willi

COLBZ said...

touche and I am not even LDS! Don't let anyone judge you!

Cara said...

OK I am now caught...I do blog stalk your super cute blog and I am so sorry that you were confronted with the terrible things Anonymous said. How right you are about people being apart of the church that may take offense to something like that and then hold it against the entire religion...so glad that is not your personality. Keep your head up :)

Anonymous said...

AAAAAAAA! Part of me wants to cry, part of me wants to stand on a mountain and shout out to the world that your heart is in the right place, no matter what anyone thinks! Satan will crawl his way in to any and every situation that is good, honest, noteworthy, kind, loving, pure.... and THAT is precisley what is happening with this woman or man WHO does NOT know you. There is NO WAY this person could have ever MET YOU in person. Impossible. I will pray for this person. I have one thing to say to them, "Take a look in the mirror and clean up your own house!"

Tami said...

My sweet Nadia. At this time I want you to know that I am so proud of your determination. I was SO relieved when I first read anonymous' comments, ONE of my FIRST thoughts was "I am soooo glad that my Nadia has SUCH A STRONG testimony of the church. THIS WILL NOT GET HER!!!!" I am not sure I have ever met a more precious soul, You were born to be a leader. Even when you were a little girl.....such an explosive personality. No surprise that your nickname has always been "Sunshine". You were born into this world to influence great numbers of people and THAT you have done! The older you get the more I realize just how fitting that nickname is. You are warm and bright and essential. This has the workings of satan all over it. I am not saying that anonymous is evil!! Don't get me wrong. But I will say that her/his attitude is like a cancer that will devour goodness if you allow it. Keep up that chin my sweet! Keep it UP! Love you!

Katie said...

I don't want to bag on anonymous - they are probably sitting pretty low right now. But I do want to tell you that I love reading your blog because you inspire me to be better. And I've told you that before in comments. You rock.

Shalyn said...

O mylanta...I dont usually respond to posts as special as this one because I literally dont have words but I am going to try here. I have only hung out with you a couple times but you really are a special person and the way you handled that response was with nothing but class. No one is perfect and we are all fighting the same battle. This reminded me to be more patient with others because of that. Chin up- im glad to call you my (sort of;-)) friend! Please dont stop sharing your sweet posts from the heart.

AUBREEZE said...

remember how you are the most generous, loving, kind, Christlike person I know??? remember how you got called "trashy" bahhaha!

nadia I think I love you 1/2 as much as Heavenly Father, which is a ridiculous very large amount!

fhe this monday??

Anonymous said...

Hey lovely, do you know anyone how has a blackberry curve they are getting rid of?????

bently said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Keisha Voorhees said...

i have recieved so many comments of this nature. some i needed to hear and others were completely unnecessary and out of line. i am often chastized for replying to them, but i know who i am, what i believe and what i am worth. i will not let myself be misunderstood in that way. i loved reading your reply and i hope that this does not affect you negatively in any way. you're such a beautiful, honest, STRONG woman that is looked up to by so many people.
Please, dismiss the negativity of this remark and keep doing what you're doing. thank you!

Josh and DJ Heninger said...

i love you nads, cheer up.

Melissa said...

Hi Nadia! I found your blog on Megan's and I was so shocked by this anonymous person, I had to comment! From someone who doesn't know you personally, but just "knows of" you: I think you are great! What a self righteous and ridiculous thing for someone to say to ANYONE, let alone someone they don't even know. Keep being you, because you are fabulous! Cute blog :)